Fear Factor Lawsuit is Just Plain Scary

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"Fear Factor Lawsuit is Just Plain Scary" -- January 9, 2005

As a long-time viewer of Fear Factor (i.e., someone who really needs to get a life), I knew that the show was a prime target for a lawsuit. After all, any show that regularly asks people to eat earthworms, live crickets and pig stomachs is asking for trouble; or at least, high ratings.

Well, that trouble came in the form of a lawsuit filed last week by a Cleveland man. Austin Aitken, a viewer, sued the show because … get this … he became nauseous after watching other people eat dead rats on a December 27th episode. As a result, he believes that either the show or the network (and he’s not being picky here) owes him $2.5 million.

This lawsuit is incredible even in America, where filing a frivolous lawsuit appears to be a requirement of citizenship. It should be clear to anyone who isn’t either brain dead or a member of Bush’s “Torture Is OK With Us” Justice Department that you can’t sue a television show just because it makes you sick.

For example, each week, I become physically ill when they make the men take off their shirts during the weigh-in on The Biggest Loser. Yet, I haven’t sued NBC for it; at least, not yet. Likewise, my wife becomes absolutely disgusted when she comes into the room and finds me watching the WWF (Women Wresting in Fudge). Yet, once again, she doesn’t sue the network for airing it.

NOTE TO THE MEN: Stop searching frantically through your local listings to find out what time this show comes on. I just made it up.

Besides even if viewer nausea were grounds for a lawsuit, Aitken should be the last person claiming delicate sensibilities. According to the CourtTV web site, he just recently completed a 27-month prison term for check forgery and theft. Anyone who spent two years eating prison food (or my wife’s not-so-sweet potato pie) should think of dead rats as a delicacy. I know I do.

Perhaps, the saddest aspect of this case is that Aitken isn’t as foolish as you might think. While the legal basis for his case may be shakier than the floorboards in The Biggest Loser house, there is a decent chance that NBC will secretly settle this lawsuit just to make it go away. In fact, it appears that Aitken may have just found his next scam.

And the worst part is that this scam is perfectly legal. Sadly, there are no criminal penalties for filing frivolous lawsuits. This is something that the President and his crack (or should I say, “on crack”) legal team should address during his second term.

What we need is a way to punish people who bring these lawsuits so that they think twice before filing them in the first place. For example, if I was the judge in this case, I would not only throw out Aitken’s lawsuit, but I would make him eat any leftover rats from the show. And if Fear Factor couldn’t find any leftover rats, I’d be happy to volunteer some of the leftovers from my fridge. Trust me, he’d think twice about his decision to file a frivolous lawsuit (or get married). I know I do.

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